Emotions

I'm sure that some of the extreme emotions I felt yesterday had to do with being up since 5:30 AM. Yesterday was the first of 2 shows for my girls as they danced in The Snow Queen. While they were on stage dancing during the first show I just felt very proud of them and happy, and frustrated that because they are in the same scene very hard to watch them both at the same time, and they were on different ends of the stage the whole time. At the end of the show all the dancers come out by group to take a bow. I cried then. The plan was to come home between shows to grab something to eat before heading back downtown for the next show. S and R didn't come out of the dressing room, everyone else left including the show's director, and still no S and R, I was freaking out, and it was worse because I'm the only one standing there waiting for them. I tried to go back to get them, but because of security they wouldn't let me. Finally they come out, They are not alone they have another girl with them, who is about R's age. She wants to go to Subway, R wants to go with her. I was very angry at that point and no way would I let R walk around downtown without an adult and we needed to go home not only to get dinner but to get P who was coming to the evening show. I'm sure I embarrassed her with my anger. I felt embarrassed too, but I was stressed out and angry. We finally made it to the car, and surprisingly I figured out how to get to the freeway by myself. Only one freeway curves off and the freeway I'm in the wrong lane to get on the freeway I need to be to get home. Sigh. So I get off the wrong freeway to turn around to get on the right one to get home. By the time we stopped to get food (fast food) to eat at home, because J and P needed dinner too, we had 30 minutes to eat before we had to leave to drive downtown again. I'll get back to what P did that made me crazy. On the drive home, my cell phone rang. S got it out of my purse for me, I just figured it would be P or J wanting to know where we were or what's for dinner. Nope, it was my MIL who tells me that herself and FIL will not be coming to the evening performance, because her brother died and she was too upset to go and FIL was going to stay with her, so he wouldn't be coming either. OK, I get it that her brother just died and she's upset, I don't want to sound cold here but her brother had cancer, and really he lived a lot longer than his doctor thought he would. So it shouldn't really come as a shock that he died. There's more feelings into this, but I can't get into it. P called her when we got home last night and she couldn't talk very long to him without crying. So she hands the phone off to Dad, P asks his Dad about the Cardinal game they are supposed to go to today. Yes, he would still be going to that. MIL wants him to go. WHAT. That really angers me. She'll be OK, the day after her brother dies, for her husband to go to a football game, but not be OK to let him go watch his granddaughters dance the night before? Really, really angers me. I thought I would feel better about it today, but really it makes me more angrier, because you see my husband as in S and R's father is going to this football game with his father and not going to watch his daughters dance. Back to P last night. He just was getting home when we pulled up to the house at 5 PM. Only he forgot to get my prescriptions that I've had on the counter since Wednesday, I call the scripts in and leave the empty bottles on the counter, so he knows to pick them up, they are filled at the pharmacy located in the store he works at. He leaves to go back to get them. So instead of having a little (and I mean little since we only had 30 minutes anyway) of a peaceful family meal together, I was left to do everything and be stressed that he would be back by 5:30. He barely makes it, and I don't talk to him the whole drive downtown. There was just too much for me to be able to talk nicely, so I just didn't say anything.